In The Secure Love Podcast, follow real-life couple Melissa and Drew through 20 unscripted coaching sessions. With expert commentary and free homework downloads, you’ll learn how attachment theory can help you transform conflict into connection.

Repairing after a negative cycle is one of the most powerful skills in a relationship. In Chapter Eight of the Secure Love Book Club, Julie Menanno guides readers through the process of emotional repair—what it looks like, why it’s hard, and how to make it meaningful.

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) helps partners break negative cycles and build secure bonds using the science of attachment. Learn how EFT works and why it’s so effective.

Emotional engagement is at the heart of connection, but many partners struggle to share their inner experience. This post offers gentle, practical tools to support your partner in opening up without pressure or intrusion.

In this session, Julie explores how emotional disgust, toward our own feelings or our partner’s, can silently block intimacy and emotional engagement. A powerful conversation with real-life examples and tools for healing.

Reaching and responding are the smallest, most powerful moves in a relationship—and the ones most likely to be misunderstood. Chapter 7 helps you spot the reach, respond with intention, and change the entire trajectory of a moment.

Therapy can help people with avoidant attachment communicate more openly, connect more deeply, and become more emotionally available in relationships.

Learn how to turn everyday interactions into an “attachment-friendly” environment, swap reflexive fight-or-flight reactions for healthy connection, and use Julie’s E-V-I-C-T framework to keep shame (and negative cycles) out of your relationship.

Old betrayals, lost dreams, and “wasted years” create hidden grief that silently powers the negative cycle. In this preview, Julie Menanno explains how to name and process relationship grief so couples can move out of stuckness and into secure connection—catch the full replay inside Julie’s Group.

In Part 2 of Chapter 5, Julie ditches the slide deck for a full hour of live Q & A—pressure-testing interruption tools on real couples, unpacking avoidant re-engagement, and prescribing homework that turns resentment into micro-repairs before Chapter 6.

When your partner triggers you, the L.O.V.E. tool helps you pause, regulate, and respond with clarity and care. Here's how to shift from reaction to connection.

In Part 1 of Chapter 5, we explore what it takes to interrupt your negative cycle in the moment. Julie shares how to slow down, name the pattern, and choose connection over protection—even when it’s hard.

Julie Menanno pinpoints the hidden trio—unmet needs, fear, and negative cycles—that keep partners spinning in place, and shares the first tiny moves that push a relationship forward again.

Get stuck in the same argument with your partner? The Mapping Your Negative Cycle workshop helps you uncover what’s really happening—and how to change it.

Shame is often the hidden force behind emotional disconnection. This workshop helps you understand, name, and work with shame—so it no longer controls your relationships.

Your attachment style shapes how you love, fight, and connect. The Attachment 101 Course helps you understand your emotional patterns—and how to build secure bonds.

Every partner has attachment needs that support emotional safety. Learn how unmet needs and fears drive disconnection—and how to move back toward security.

In Chapter 4 of the Secure Love Book Club, Julie Menanno explores how negative cycles—not your partner—keep you stuck. Learn how to map your cycle and begin the path to healing disconnection.

Every couple has a negative cycle that hijacks connection. Peek inside Julie’s coaching group to learn the first steps for slowing yours—and find out how to join the next live session.

Avoidant attachment doesn’t mean your partner can’t connect. Learn four key ways to help them feel safe, successful, and emotionally understood.