Secure Attachment Is Not Enmeshment: How to Avoid Enmeshment in Your Relationship
Secure Attachment Is Not Enmeshment: How to Avoid Enmeshment in Your Relationship
Avoid Enmeshment in Your Relationship By:
Nurturing Relationships Outside of Your Partnership
Giving Each Other Permission to Have Different Thoughts and Perspectives
Not Taking Each Other for Granted
Prioritizing Connection Over Control
Not Objectifying Each Other
Maintaining Curiosity About Each Other
Encouraging Each Other’s Growth, Success, and Happiness as Individuals
Enmeshment and Insecure Attachment
Enmeshment often stems from insecure attachment styles, where partners rely too heavily on each other for emotional validation, identity, and self-worth. This dynamic can blur boundaries, leading to a loss of individuality and balance in the relationship.
To avoid enmeshment and cultivate secure attachment, focus on building trust, maintaining individuality, and fostering mutual growth. For more on finding security and balance, explore Julie Menanno’s book, Secure Love.
“Secure attachment thrives on balance: prioritizing connection while respecting individuality.”
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In Chapter 9 of Secure Love, we explore attachment injuries—what they are, how they form, and what it takes to repair them. These moments of relational pain shape our protective strategies, but they also offer an opportunity for deeper connection if we’re willing to stay emotionally engaged.