Cart
undefined
Looking to strengthen your relationship? Our blog offers expert relationship tips rooted in attachment theory and Emotionally Focused Therapy. Learn how to identify your attachment style, communicate more effectively, and foster emotional safety with your partner. From overcoming conflict to building deeper trust, our practical advice and tools, created by couples therapist Julie Menanno, are designed to help you move toward a secure and fulfilling connection. Dive in and start transforming your relationships today!
When your partner triggers you, the L.O.V.E. tool helps you pause, regulate, and respond with clarity and care. Here's how to shift from reaction to connection.
In Part 1 of Chapter 5, we explore what it takes to interrupt your negative cycle in the moment. Julie shares how to slow down, name the pattern, and choose connection over protection—even when it’s hard.
Julie Menanno pinpoints the hidden trio—unmet needs, fear, and negative cycles—that keep partners spinning in place, and shares the first tiny moves that push a relationship forward again.
Get stuck in the same argument with your partner? The Mapping Your Negative Cycle workshop helps you uncover what’s really happening—and how to change it.
Shame is often the hidden force behind emotional disconnection. This workshop helps you understand, name, and work with shame—so it no longer controls your relationships.
Your attachment style shapes how you love, fight, and connect. The Attachment 101 Course helps you understand your emotional patterns—and how to build secure bonds.
Every partner has attachment needs that support emotional safety. Learn how unmet needs and fears drive disconnection—and how to move back toward security.
In Chapter 4 of the Secure Love Book Club, Julie Menanno explores how negative cycles—not your partner—keep you stuck. Learn how to map your cycle and begin the path to healing disconnection.
Every couple has a negative cycle that hijacks connection. Peek inside Julie’s coaching group to learn the first steps for slowing yours—and find out how to join the next live session.
Avoidant attachment doesn’t mean your partner can’t connect. Learn four key ways to help them feel safe, successful, and emotionally understood.
Anxious partners over-sacrifice. Avoidant partners resist change. Secure partners give for the greater good. Learn how attachment shapes relationship sacrifices.
The emotional patterns you repeat in your relationship often stem from your attachment style. This post outlines common signs of anxious or avoidant attachment.
Anger can divide or connect—depending on how it’s expressed. This post shows the difference between reactive and assertive anger and how to use it for deeper connection.
It can feel easier to label your partner than to feel powerless. But what if the answer isn’t in blame, but in understanding the cycle? This post offers a new way forward.
After a fight, couples often choose between self-abandonment, protest, or repair. This post breaks down the three paths and helps you choose connection over disconnection.
A secure relationship doesn’t feel like constant bliss. It feels safe. Valued. Trusted. Seen. This post explains what secure attachment really looks and feels like.
Real relationship change takes repetition, reflection, and support. Julie’s Bi-Weekly Group gives you live guidance, a community of growth, and tools that last.
Your partner’s bad mood doesn’t have to mean disconnection. Learn how to regulate your nervous system, reflect with empathy, and stay connected—even when it’s hard.
In Chapter 3 of Secure Love, we begin one of the most foundational steps in the healing process—identifying your attachment style. In this session, I guide readers through recognizing the patterns that shape how they relate, connect, and protect themselves in relationships.
Setting boundaries in a loving relationship doesn’t mean shutting your partner out. It means protecting emotional safety while staying committed to connection.
Negative cycles quietly weave partners into the very conflict they want to escape. Learn to notice the pattern—and the soft first moves that loosen its grip.
In this session, we explore what it really means to “expect too much” in a relationship. Julie talks about how sometimes, without realizing it, we lean too heavily on our partner to manage emotions we haven’t yet learned to hold ourselves. This can show up as constant venting, needing endless reassurance, or expecting our partner to join us in unhealthy ways of coping.... like over controlling, avoiding, or shutting down.
In this session, Julie explores the often unspoken question: Am I carrying too much of the emotional weight in my relationship? She breaks down what emotional work really means—offering support, creating space for connection, showing vulnerability—and helps you identify when it starts to feel one-sided or unsustainable.
Julie guides you through why these patterns develop, what they might be protecting, and how to begin shifting out of them. Whether you tend to over-function or struggle to engage emotionally, this conversation offers a clear, grounded path toward more balance, clarity, and connection.
In this meeting, Julie dives into the crucial role of emotional safety and communication during disagreements. She highlights how it's not the disagreement itself, but how couples handle it that truly matters. Learn how being open, curious, and validating each other's emotions can help maintain a safe space for constructive conversations.
Julie also explores how small arguments often mask deeper emotional needs, like wanting to feel heard or valued. She addresses how different attachment styles (anxious versus avoidant) can influence communication and encourages couples to better understand each other’s emotional needs.
Julie Menanno pinpoints the hidden trio—unmet needs, fear, and negative cycles—that keep partners spinning in place, and shares the first tiny moves that push a relationship forward again.